Careers - Food for thought?

Sometimes it’s difficult to read people in business. After all, we’re all trained in how to control our body language, how to question and listen and how to exert influence. After a while you get good at it. But then again so does the client. Over my years in consultancy, I’ve developed a theory that I think gets you through to the real business person that bit quicker.

The theory is that human beings are highly developed animals. Any observer of animals looks closely at a few key things: mating habits, survival responses (fight or flight) and feeding habits.

Unfortunately, it is not always possible to observe the mating habits of one’s clients – at least not early on in the client relationship – while retaining one’s professional independence. And the opportunity to observe a client under attack doesn’t happen that often. That leaves going out to lunch or dinner. And everyone does that.

Here are a few of the main feeding types I’ve met over several years of hard dining.

The leaver

This one orders a large meal and then leaves it. It’s not an accident.

He prefers it that way. He will even do this in a self-service restaurant where he can choose his own quantities.

I had lunch with a colleague from a large corporation. I noticed he left about a third of his meal. When he left it again the next time, I decided to tackle him:

“I noticed you left most of your dinner. Why? I mean it’s self service.

You could have had less and finished it.”

“I always do it,” he said, “I don’t know why.”

Next day I gave him some work to do. “It’s important,”I said. “I need it tonight.”

He left at five and gave me the file. I checked it. Sure enough, he left about a third of it undone. Just like his dinner.

Tip: Keep on his tail. Get regular reports. Give him the work in small bites and make sure he chews them all up and swallows.

The glutton

Never mind the quality, feel the width. This guy wants his plate, his cup, his pint, soup bowl and his pudding dish filled right up. If it isn’t, he changes restaurant.

On one project, I was joined by my boss in the canteen, just as I was starting the pud – a blueberry yoghurt corner. He plonked his plate and large sponge pudding on the table. “Oh,” he said, “Blueberry. Delicious.

I used to eat one of those every day. But nowadays they don’t put so much blueberry in. It’s only three quarters full. So I don’t eat them any more.” This guy liked value. At the beginning of the project we worked all night for him but at the end when it was running down, he still wanted his standard hours.

Tip: Watch your rates with this one. Expect to be knocked down. Don’t do anything for nothing. There’s no point, he doesn’t keep a score and there will never be any pay back.

The stabber

She eats her small dinner quite quickly. Except for a morsel. She chases this around the plate with a fork, half nudging it; half stabbing it.

It the end she leaves it uneaten.

A colleague chased a pea around her plate. “I’m going to kill it,” she said. But instead she left it. In the afternoon she made a series of comments about a team member who wasn’t very good. He still works for her. She still doesn’t think he’s up to it. She’s still chasing him round the plate.

Tip: Send this one on an assertiveness, Outward Bound or other “go for it” course. There’s no point in stabbing a bit and not achieving anything.

Take some action.

The complainer

If he doesn’t like it, he sends it back. A business acquaintance of mine is a chronic complainer. He regularly orders a meal. When it’s delivered, he looks at it, tells the waiter he’s changed his mind and orders something else. There’s nothing wrong with the food. He just sends it back. I think he even pays for both. This man rarely returns a phone call unless he wants something. He will be friends during the project but not afterwards. He knows exactly what he wants and goes for it. He has a cruel streak and enjoys taunting waiters.

Tip: Do business with him if you like, but you’ll do it his way and expect the odd surprise.

The wiper

This guy eats just about anything and he eats it all. He moves through the meal at a steady but graceful pace, leaving time to talk. At the end he might eat the gravy with a spoon. The accomplished wiper will massage the plate thoroughly with a piece of bread to clear up every last drop.

A few months ago, for example, on a project in a UN war zone, the city came under attack. When the cluster bombs dropped the project was loaded on to the back of a van, moved to a safe spot on the coast and the staff were relocated. The project carried on until it was safe to move back again. The job came in on time and only a few hundred dollars over budget.

And, my God, that few hundred dollars bugged the project manager. It laid there like a little pool of gravy. If only he’d had a piece of bread, he’d have polished it off.

Tip: Employ this guy – he gets the job done. In team-role theorist Dr Meredith Belbin’s terms, he’s a complete finisher. The wiper gets the job done and meets the budget and deadlines too.

And the project manager concerned? It was me!

John Hughes is a chartered accountant and independent IT consultant who works with financial systems. He spent most of 1995 in Croatia as an Oracle Financials project manager.