Sleepless in the supermarket


There is nothing quite as satisfying as a good night’s sleep, which is why TS can sympathise with Morrison’s departing FD Martin Ackroyd.

Strolling leisurely into the office at half elevenish, after a nice lie-in and a full English down the greasy spoon, TS was shocked to discover that Martin had only got 15 minutes of shut-eye ­ the poor lamb. Speaking at the Morrison’s results presentation, a bloodshot Ackroyd said: ‘Excuse me for the frog in my throat, but I only got to bed 6.30am this morning and got up at quarter to seven.’

TS is not sure what was keeping him up, but hopes that now Martin no longer has to worry about the Safeway accounting system, he will be able to get his recommended eight hours kip a night.

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